Parenting Challenges or Relationship Challenges??
Ceara Deno, MD • May 14, 2025
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Parenting Challenges or Relationship Challenges??
Does this sound familiar?
It’s one of those parenting moments where everything is spiraling — but instead of getting support from your partner, you feel...
...even more alone?
Maybe you're trying to stay calm and connected with your sensitive child.
But then your partner walks in with a completely different energy: yelling, punishing, or undoing everything you just tried to do.
Or maybe you’re the one setting limits and getting frustrated because your partner always swoops in to rescue the child.
So then you’re left feeling like the “bad guy.”
Here’s the truth I’ve seen again and again:
A lot of the hardest parenting moments aren’t just about your child… they’re about your relationship.
You and your partner want the same thing.
A peaceful home, a thriving child, and a parenting approach that actually works.
But when stress levels rise, and your fears get triggered…
...you can end up on opposite teams.
Here are just a few common couple dynamics that show up disguised as parenting problems:
1.) The “good cop / bad cop” dynamic:
One parent leads with empathy, the other with structure — and they both feel undermined.
2.) Feeling unsupported:
One parent sets a boundary, the other unknowingly undoes it.
3.) Arguing about the child, but it’s really about each other:
Resentments build, and the child’s behavior becomes a battlefield.
4.) One partner feels deprioritized:
When all the nurturing goes to the child, the other adult feels invisible.
5.) Differences in parenting styles feel personal:
What started as a disagreement about bedtime now feels like a rejection of your identity.
If any of this feels familiar, I want you to know:
You’re not failing.
You’re just human — and trying to raise a sensitive child in a high-stress environment, without a shared playbook, is really hard.
But you don’t have to keep doing this alone — or stuck in survival mode.
I help parents of highly sensitive kids learn how to support their child and reconnect as a parenting team — even if they see things differently.
If you're ready for less blame and more connection, I’d love to talk.
We can figure out where you’re getting stuck, where your parenting styles may be clashing, and how to get back on the same team — for your child and for each other.
Sending lots of love,
Ceara
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Have you ever noticed how something as simple as leaving the playground, turning off a tablet, or getting ready for school can spark big resistance—or even a meltdown? For many children, especially those who are highly sensitive or deeply feeling, transitions are some of the hardest moments of the day. It’s not because they’re being “difficult”—it’s because their brains and nervous systems experience change differently. The good news: once you understand why transitions are so challenging, you can respond with empathy and tools that make them easier. Here are 5 common reasons transitions are tough for your child—and what you can do to help. 1. They’re Deeply Engaged in the Moment Highly sensitive kids often immerse themselves fully in what they’re doing—whether that’s reading, building, or playing. Being asked to stop feels like being pulled out of a world they love. How to help: Give gentle warnings before the change. Try: “Five more minutes of play, then it’s time for dinner.” Using a timer or visual countdown can help them prepare. 2. Their Brains Need More Time to Shift Gears Transitions require mental flexibility, which can be harder for sensitive nervous systems. Switching from one activity to another i s like changing lanes on a crowded highway—it takes time. How to help: Use consistent signals to cue transitions, such as a special song, a picture schedule, or a fun countdown routine. 3. Transitions Can Feel Like a Loss of Control Children often feel like transitions are imposed on them. That lack of control can trigger pushback or power struggles. How to help: Offer simple choices so they feel empowered. For example: “Do you want to brush teeth first or change into pajamas first?” 4. They Anticipate Stress in the Next Activity If your child expects the next step to be boring, stressful, or less enjoyable, they may resist leaving the current activity. How to help: Empathize first: “It’s hard to stop playing, I know.” Then, ease the shift with something to look forward to: “Want to bring your toy to the car so it feels easier?” 5. Their Nervous Systems Feel Every Shift More Intensely Highly sensitive kids notice and react to even small changes in environment, energy, and routine. What feels like a tiny shift to you may feel overwhelming to them. How to help: Keep routines predictable when possible. Create comforting rituals—like a goodbye hug, a special handshake, or a silly phrase—that help anchor them during transitions. The Takeaway Transitions are about more than just moving from one activity to another—they involve emotions, expectations, and a sensitive nervous system. With empathy and small adjustments, you can turn transition battles into moments of connection. 💛 Parenting a highly sensitive child isn’t easy—but it’s also filled with opportunities to build trust, closeness, and resilience. If you’d like more guidance on making daily challenges like transitions smoother, I’d love to support you. I offer one-on-one parent coaching tailored to families raising deeply feeling kids. Schedule a free call with me here.
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