Aggression is a unique trigger for peaceful parents
“My child keeps being violent with his brother.”
“My son is aggressive towards me.”
Few things are more triggering to parents than aggression.
Honestly, it makes us filled with revenge. We want to teach a lesson—show that child how wrong they are—we may even be willing to use force to teach the lesson. Even the most peaceful parents get completely triggered.
We get afraid OF our child. We get afraid FOR our child's future.
Because we are in fear as parents, we cannot respond compassionately, empathetically or creatively.
Because we are in fear, we react instinctively, reflexively, inflexibly—often with harshness.
The result is that a child who is reacting to their own fears is met with our fear, which feels terrifying to the child, and the situation explodes like a tinder box.
It makes sense that we can't be an emotional anchor for our child until we find our own sense of calm first.
So first we work on our own thoughts around our child. This is one area where coaching can be incredibly supportive.
