How to Help a Kid Who’s Dysregulated

This week I was talking to the mom of a sensitive 5 year old, who would throw a fit every time he didn't get his way. 

He would scream and say mean things.  He would hit, or throw things out of anger. 

His parents would end up getting frustrated and yelling, too. 

They really worried about Brayden.

They noticed that other 5 year olds didn’t act like this. 

They had fears of him never learning to handle his emotions and becoming a school shooter. 

Brayden is typical of many highly sensitive kids who continue to struggle with emotional dysregulation.

What is emotional dysregulation?

Emotional dysregulation is when big feelings “take over” the brain.   In this state of overwhelm, emotions can be expressed as crying, yelling, whining, running away, shutting down emotionally, etc. 

What can help Brayden, and other sensitive kids like him, learn to handle his big feelings in healthier ways? 

Here are some suggestions for ways to help you both when she has big emotional outbursts: 

1.) Remind yourself, “This is not an emergency:”  

Calm is contagious. When you are able to find your own calm, your child is able to borrow some of that calm.  

2.) Decrease stimulation:

Go somewhere quiet, turn down the radio, turn off the TV, get away from other people.  

3.) Allow the emotion:

Allow your child to feel their emotions without needing to fix or minimize the feeling. For them, the feelings make sense and are valid.  

4.) Physical touch: 

Try some physical touch. Put your arm around your child. Let them sit on your lap. Touch is a grounding way to help your child feel calm quicker, if they are receptive.  

5.) Notice overstimulation triggers: 

Look for patterns about when your child struggles the most. Is bedtime always challenging? The first hour after getting home from school? Is being criticized a trigger? Or feeling left out?  

If you are the parent of a child who struggles with emotional dysregulation, there is support.

If you are ready to help your child handle his/her big feelings in healthier ways, my new, free ebook can help.

This book is for parents of sensitive kids who want fewer power struggles and meltdowns, and more peace, connection, and cooperation.  You will get tips and strategies to teach your child to handle emotions in healthy ways.  

Get my free ebook by clicking here.