Apologizing. Are you doing it? Are you doing it correctly?

Ceara Deno, MD • July 28, 2021
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Kids learn to apologize by our modeling it

How will kids learn to apologize if adults don’t model it?


Apologizing is SO important!


It shows:


--powerful people take responsibility for our mistakes 

--respect for the other person

--accountability for my behavior 

--empathy for your feelings


Here are 2 important thoughts about apologizing to our kids. 


First, a true apology means taking actual responsibility.  When I say, ”Sorry I yelled at you, but you were rude,” I am actually blaming you for my poor behavior.  That’s the OPPOSITE of taking responsibility.  Taking responsibility is “I’m sorry I yelled.  You don’t deserve to be yelled at.” 


Second, a true apology does NOT involve shaming ourselves.  I don’t say, “I’m a terrible person for yelling at you, you deserve a better mother.”  This communicates that mistakes are not OK, when in fact, mistakes are NORMAL.  Mistakes don’t make us a bad person, they make us human.


Want to learn more about apology and other tools to connect and repair with your child?



Contact me.  I help parents create a deeper connection by using peaceful communication tools.


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